“If sleeping together is difficult, talk to your partner about ways to compromise what you need versus maintaining the relationship,” says Greene. She advises bringing the subject up with your SO. If you sense that sleeping apart is either a sign of or creating issues in the relationship, then Greene says it's time to address them head on. For example, if “it was an agreement you made to please your partner - but now makes you miserable,” or if the separate sleeping arrangements “mirror the distance between you and your partner,” then it’s time to address the issue before it becomes an emotional distance and not just a physical one. Winter adds that it should also be a cause for concern if only one the two parties consents to the sleeping arrangement. “Just like any other differences, this is one that should take priority in figuring out a solution so you don’t miss out on the coziness, connectedness, and closeness that sleeping together creates.” It’s the most private space for two people in a loving relationship.” Greene acknowledges that sleep is essential to your health and wellbeing, so you shouldn't sacrifice it completely, but instead find a balance. It should not become a habit because sharing a bed is reserved for lovers. However, she warns that “continuous sleeping apart can have a negative impact on the couple’s relationship. “It’s fine in the short term,” Fran Greene, dating and relationship coach and author of The Secret Rules of Flirting, tells Elite Daily. While there are situations where choosing to sleep separately is perfectly fine, there are other instances where you should be concerned. Which is why I was really interested in speaking to relationship experts about whether or not it's OK to sleep apart, and when or if I should be worried that in doing so, it would put my relationship in danger. I tell myself that it's no one's business but ours, but still, that shame lingers. While I knew why I was making the choice to sleep on my own and felt like it was justified, I still couldn't help feeling self conscious about what people's perceptions might be of our relationship if they learned how often we sleep separately. I often wonder: Is it normal to sleep in separate beds sometimes? Or is not physically sleeping together going to ruin the relationship? Makes sense, right? And yet, I still felt ashamed of it, as if it was some dark secret. So, at least a few nights a week, I sneak off because it's the only way I can possibly hope to get some rest. I'm a light sleeper who struggles with insomnia, so there are times when I can't get comfortable, or my partner making any noise in their sleep will wake me up. Confession time: My partner and I don't always sleep in the same room.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
AuthorWrite something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview. ArchivesCategories |